DISORGANIZED? MOI?

I have read just about every article on “How to Get Organized.” I have tried most of them – however fleetingly – and declared most of them to be worthless.                                 Now at the age of 91, I have decided that when all else fails one has to depend on ones own abilities. Long pause here while I deal with the fact that, organizationally speaking, I HAVE NO ORGANIZATIONAL ABILITIES!

I have, however, been able to pin down the main difficulty. I am too easily distracted.   I have noticed this particularly as I am trying to pack up things in my apartment to get ready to move into my wonderfully planned new Tiny House. And yes, you may certainly come visit once I move in, but only one of you at a time.

There it is. Right there. I got distracted. I was about to discuss the problems of packing up but my mind went to my exciting new journey into a Tiny House. That led me to invite you all to come visit. That lead to mentioning that you should all come alone because I don’t like crowds in small spaces., and then on to the worrying about what I should plan to feed any of you who decide to take me up on my invitation. I mean, after all, a Tiny House can’t hold dinner for eight.

SEE?

At this particular moment the phone rang and I am totally incapable of not answering a phone. Even when I know it is someone I’d rather not speak to, I answer the phone. It’s just the polite thing to do…and everyone knows how important doing the right, polite thing to do is to me and… But let’s start again. I AM disorganized. I realize it. But apparently the first part of the problem is learning to concentrate on one thing at a time…dealing with it…

Wait. That phone call. It was my neighbor reminding me that she brought me some home made cupcakes a week or so ago and I never returned her plate. I have to do that.   Hold on. I’ll be right back.

I’m back. My neighbor met me in the hall. Apparently she thought when I said “I’ll be right there” that I meant immediately. Of course that was an approximation. But anyway… She’d just colored her hair. It is a rather involved process so we had to discuss it for a few minutes…But now I’m back. Again.

Organization.   Right.

I organized stuff once upon a time. It was right after my divorce. I took a job – and god knows how or why anyone would hire me for it – as a secretary.

Aside from me, everyone in the office seemed to know what they were doing. THEY were organized. I was mostly bored. So I set out to fix me. I had four guys I was to assist. I gave each of them a color. Ed was Orange, Mac was Blue, Ted was Purple and George was brown. I didn’t really like George and brown is one of my least favorite colors.

They began to invite folks from other offices to come view our colorful files. “See?” They would say. “All that stuff in the Orange file is mine…” They were proud and so was I. Until the time came when they were beginning to look for things I’d filed.

I gave notice and left – not just the job – but the town…actually, the whole state. I went back to Philadelphia where no one could find me because I used my pre marriage name. Steck.

Now that’s another funny story. Here in California the initials aka (Also Known As) are very familiar. Almost everyone has one…or used to before foreign names became acceptable as compared to Rock and Troy and Todd. But in Philadelphia aka was strange.  I was at the bank, opening up new accounts in my new, old home town and I listed myself as Elizabeth Bonaduce aka Betty Steck. The checker looked at the application and then at me. She stared a moment then excused herself. She joined another lady who looked at the application, then at me. It became her job to confront me. “This aka,” she said. “What is that? And the antsy teller broke in. “What are you, some kind of criminal?”

Now what was I talking about? Oh. Right. Organization. But you can see what happens. It isn’t my fault. Life just keeps interrupting me. My original plan was to ask you all for tips on how you organize your worlds. What is it you do that’s different. Or maybe what do you do that’s the same every time.

Every time you walk in the door, do you remember to hang up the keys right were they are supposed to hang? I find that every once in a while I forget to do that, and then, when I go to look, and they aren’t where I knew they were going to be, I have no idea where to even START looking.

One strange thing that I am really organized about is toilet paper. I do not like toilet paper that is hung wrong. And that means, in my world, that the roll goes over the top and then down. I even go so far as to rehang toilet paper in public bathrooms. Why do I care? I haven’t a clue, but for some reason, THIS is important to me.

Organization? Hell, I don’t know. Maybe we can deal with it next time if I can get myself together by then. Meantime,

HERE IS THE WORD OF THE MONTH:

OLIGARCHY: A small group of people having control of a country, organization or institution. Example: the ruling oligarchy of military men around a president.

And here’s a little note of interest – or, perhaps, a note of little interest . It took me a while to find the proper definition because I was spelling OLIGARCHY with a e not an i. Now I see the need for dictionarians (okay, I made that up. ) but if there were a word like that, I think they should organize a way to look up misspelled words. Otherwise how does anyone know where the correct spelling is hiding?